A rider blessed with a pair of good hands is able to communicate effectively with their horse. They are often described as being sympathetic or kind riders because their hands are never used to harshly punish the horse. While they may school the horse using their hand aids, it is never done so beyond the minimal amount necessary to get the point across to the horse. For these reasons, the horse both respects and trusts its rider. But not all horses are created equally when it comes to the mouth department.
Some horses seem to be born with a mouth that fits one extreme or the other. There are horses with hard mouths, and horses with over-sensitive, soft mouths. Both are challenges. The horse with the hard mouth almost immediately begins to lean on the bit. It is also less supple laterally, meaning it doesn't willingly give its head and neck left or right. These traits may be noticed very early on in training. To understand why a horse might have a dull or hard mouth, first inspect its teeth. A vet or an equine dental specialist can address any oral problems that may cause the horse to lean or grab onto the bit. Second, study the horse's conformation. A horse with a short, thick neck, or an upside down ewe-neck (thicker on the bottom, concave on the topside) is prone to a tough mouth. They simply cannot physically be as supple as a horse with a long, sloping front end. Such horses may indeed require a little more bit to induce them to respond to light hand aids. Yet their mouths will become even tougher if they are constantly yanked or jerked on in frustration. Instead, by slowly introducing the concepts of suppling and yielding to rein and bit pressure, even the hard mouthed horse eventually becomes an enjoyable horse to ride.
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At the opposite extreme is the horse with an unusually soft mouth. Again, it may be responding to dental problems, particularly a sore or abscessed tooth. Or it could, in general, just be an overly sensitive animal. This can be both a blessing and a curse. An expert rider will know how to turn down the volume, so to speak, on any hand and rein cues. But when handled by a less experienced rider, the soft-mouthed horse is easily shaken. It may begin to purse its lips and raise its head in the air. Often these horses are said to be "afraid of their mouth," but actually they're afraid of the rider's unsympathetic hands. Mild bits, including soft rubber ones, are often all that's needed for a sensitive horse.
Except for the western pleasure show horse, virtually all horses, including both hard and soft-mouthed ones, must be taught to go on the bit. Though dressage horses seem to take this idea to the extreme, they are perhaps the epitome of a horse that is constantly in tune to their rider's wishes. While a horse on the bit may look like it's pulling on their rider's hands, if performed correctly, it is not. The rider should feel the horse's mouth at the end of the reins, yet the horse should be naturally balanced so that it is never leaning on the reins for support. Nor should the rider be using the reins for support. Both human and equine should be in harmony and working as a team.
To place a horse on the bit, you must first have a horse that is accepting and trusting of your hands. It also must yield laterally to direct bit pressure. If your horse won't bend left or right, it probably won't give at the poll or neck, either.
Begin on a large circle at the sitting trot. Let's say you're tracking to the right. Keep your contact light, and imagine that you're pushing the bit out in front of your horse with your hands, and then squeezing your horse toward the bit with your legs and seat. You're telling your horse to seek the bit. As he makes soft contact, gently pick up your contact on the reins and add slightly more inside (right) leg. Do not suddenly pull your hands to your chest. That would be bringing the bit to the horse. Instead, hold that contact for a few strides. Does your horse resist? Does he lean on your hands? If so, then half-halt to shift his weight back to his hindquarters, thereby lightening his front end. When you feel his weight shift, release the half halt, continue with your light contact, and proceed around your circle. The moment your horse stays comfortably on the bit, soften your inside rein just a little as a reward. You are telling your horse that the way he's carrying himself, balanced and lightly on the bit, is good. It takes a lot of practice, but eventually you'll be able to advance to a faster trot and even a canter and still keep your horse on the bit without getting into a pulling match.
A horse that's on the bit, and trusting of its rider, is a joy to ride. Schooling your horse should never be seen as abuse, but as education. If you feel like sometimes you cross that line and engage in harsh handling of your horse's mouth, consult a trainer or instructor to give you some personalized help.